How can you make holy water at home? You boil the hell out of it.<\/p>\n
How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the psycho path.<\/p>\n
What do fish say when they hit a concrete wall? Damn!<\/p>\n
What do eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? Polaroids<\/p>\n
What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t work? A stick.<\/p>\n
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.<\/p>\n
What do you call santa’s helpers? Subordinate clauses.<\/p>\n
What do you call four bullfighters in quicksand? Quatro sinko.<\/p>\n
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite.<\/p>\n
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A nervous wreck.<\/p>\n
What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Anyone can roast beef.<\/p>\n
Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.<\/p>\n
Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have big fingers.<\/p>\n
Why don’t blind people like to sky dive? Because it scares the hell out of the dog.<\/p>\n
What kind of coffee was served on the titanic? Sanka.<\/p>\n
What is the difference between a harley and a hoover? The location of the dirt bag.<\/p>\n
Why do a pilgrim’s pants always fall down? Because they wear their belt buckle on their hat.<\/p>\n
What’s the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver?<\/p>\n
A bad golfer goes, whack, “damn.” A bad skydiver goes “damn,” whack.<\/p>\n
How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on it.<\/p>\n
How do you catch a tame rabbit? Tame way, unique up on it.<\/p>\n
What do you call skydiving lawyers? Skeet.<\/p>\n
What goes clop, clop, clop, bang, bang, clop, clop, clop?<\/p>\n
An amish drive-by shooting.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"