![\"image\"](\"https:\/\/peter.murmann.me\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/cheney_told_me.jpg\")
<\/div>\nMAUREEN DOWD (NYT) ghostwrites George’s Bush “Mea culpa.” Don’t hold your breath. Nothing of the sort will ever come out of George Bush’s mouth. <\/i><\/p>\n
Who’s Sorry Now?<\/b><\/p>\n
There’s not much lately that we’d like to import from China.<\/p>\n
Certainly not the yummy steamed buns stuffed with shredded cardboard soaked in a caustic agent used to make soap. Or the tasty toothpaste laced with an antifreeze ingredient. Or the scrumptious seafood with a chemical kick. Or those pet foods with kibbles and bits of poison.<\/p>\n
But there is one thing made in China we could use: mea culpas of high officials.<\/p>\n
Zheng Xiaoyu, a top regulator who helped create Chinas Food and Drug Administration, accepted $850,000 in bribes from drug companies and became enmeshed in the mistakes that flooded the market with dangerous drugs. Before he was executed Tuesday, he wrote a short confession titled How I Look on My Mistakes.<\/p>\n
Thinking back on what has happened these years, I start to see the problems clearly, he wrote in prison. Why are the friends who gave me money all the bosses of pharmaceutical companies? Obviously because I was in charge of drug administration.<\/p>\n
I am confessing here that I loosened self-discipline, ignored the bottom line, he said, adding that he had to confess his mistakes as an act of saving my soul.<\/p>\n
We would skip the execution although perhaps there should be ranch arrest for W., and Cheney could do community service passing out condoms at Gay Pride festivals.<\/p>\n
But it is time for the lethally inept duo running the country to do some painstaking self-examination and confession. Just as the Communist Party helped the late Mr. Zheng compose his thoughts, I volunteer to ghost-write our leaders self-scrutiny:<\/p>\n
How I Look on My Mistakes, by George W. Bush<\/b><\/p>\n
The people trusted me with an important position. I didnt live up to expectations. I let Dick supersize the executive branch and cast Democrats as whiners and traitors. Why did I not suspect that Dick might be power-hungry when he appointed himself vice president? Why did I let him take over my presidency and fill it up with warmongers? I was so afraid to be called a wimp, as my father once was, I allowed Dick and Rummy to turn me into a wimp. I should never have allowed Dick to conspire with energy lobbyists and steer contracts to Halliburton. A tip-off should have been when Dick kept giving himself all the same powers that I had. Or when he outed that pretty lady spy.<\/p>\n
If only I had kept my promise to go after the thugs who attacked us on 9\/11, because now Ive made Osama and Al Qaeda stronger. I know my false claim about Al Qaedas ties with Iraq led to Iraqs being tied down by Al Qaeda. I see now that my bungled war on terror has created more terror, empowered Iran and made America less secure. Oh, yeah, and Im sorry I broke the military.<\/p>\n
I stained the family honor when I ignored the elders of the Iraq Study Group. I should not have worried that I would be seen as kowtowing to my dads friends. The Oval Office is not the right place for a teenage rebellion.<\/p>\n
I should not have picked that dimwit Brownie, and I should have trusted the gut of anyone besides that goof-off Chertoff to keep the nation safe. And what was I thinking when I said Harriet Miers should be a Supreme Court justice? That was loony. Im sorry I made the surgeon general mention my name three times on every page of his speeches. That was childish.<\/p>\n
How could I have let Dick bring in his best friend, Rummy, my dads old nemesis? Dummy Rummy let Osama escape at Tora Bora, messed up the Iraq occupation and aborted a mission to wipe out top Al Qaeda leaders because he was protecting Musharraf, who was protecting Al Qaeda in the tribal areas. Even though I promised to get rid of dictators who helped terrorists, I ended up embracing a Pakistani dictator who helps terrorists.<\/p>\n
Im embarrassed that the Iraqi Parliament is taking a monthlong vacation in the middle of my surge. Could I have set a bad example when I rode my bike in Crawford while New Orleans drowned?<\/p>\n
Im sorry I keep pretending Iraq will get better if we stay longer. It wasnt very nice of me to push the surge when I knew it couldnt work. I just wanted to dump the defeat on my successor. I wish Hillary the best of luck.<\/p>\n
If I had left the gym long enough to read about Algeria or even one of T. E. Lawrences Seven Pillars of Wisdom, then I might have not gotten bogged down in Iraq and let North Korea, China and Russia slide.<\/p>\n
Being the Decider is so confusing. I regret stealing the presidency and wish I could give it back.<\/p>\n
How I Look on My Mistakes, by Dick Cheney<\/b><\/p>\n
Buzz off.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
![\"image\"](\"http:\/\/localhost:8000\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/cheney_told_me.jpg\")
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