At Steak ‘n Shake I learned that if you add<\/p>\n
“Bless their hearts” after their names, you can say<\/p>\n
whatever you want about them and it’s OK.<\/p>\n
My son, bless his heart, is an idiot,<\/p>\n
she said. He rents storage space for his kids’<\/p>\n
toys\u2014they’re only one and three years old!<\/p>\n
I said, my father, bless his heart, has turned<\/p>\n
into a sentimental old fool. He gets<\/p>\n
weepy when he hears my daughter’s greeting<\/p>\n
on our voice mail. Before our Steakburgers came<\/p>\n
someone else blessed her office mate’s heart,<\/p>\n
then, as an afterthought, the jealous hearts<\/p>\n
of the entire anthropology department.<\/p>\n
We bestowed blessings on many a heart<\/p>\n
that day. I even blessed my ex-wife’s heart.<\/p>\n
Our waiter, bless his heart, would not be getting<\/p>\n
much tip, for which, no doubt, he’d bless our hearts.<\/p>\n
In a week it would be Thanksgiving,<\/p>\n
and we would each sit with our respective<\/p>\n
families, counting our blessings and blessing<\/p>\n
the hearts of family members as only family<\/p>\n
does best. Oh, bless us all, yes, bless us, please<\/p>\n
bless us and bless our crummy little hearts.<\/p>\n
“Bless Their Hearts” by Richard Newman, from Domestic Fugues. \u00a9 Steel Toe Books, 2009.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"